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Wednesday 16 January 2013

WHEN REALITY BANGS

'And I trusted you' by Bloody Mary99


“Close your eyes. Free your mind. I’m not about to whip out a ring and ask you to marry me. This is not a fairytale I’m going to pretend to create for you. It’s reality.”

Flashing lights dancing on love rainbows….shooting star streaking across the sky…no.  That was not what happened. 

I felt something hard strike my back. Felt my skin swelling in response. I bit my lip to keep from screaming.

“Keep them closed,” he said as my lids flinched to open.

I felt his fingers on my neck, fiddling with the collar of my short dress. A ripping sound and the cold air enveloping my nakedness told me he’d just ripped my dress off. I stood still. Tears running down my face. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered. 

Soft feather-like kisses caressed my collarbone. His long fingers trailing a smooth path on my curves, teased my hairs to an upstanding position. I shivered. Then he took my small waist in his arms, knelt down between my legs and kissed my womb. So soft. Then hard as though his life depended on it. A hungry moan escaped my lips.

Then he bit me, in that small patch of tender skin, that cleft between thigh and punani. I shivered till the pain got unbearable and I clawed at his head and whimpered. 

“Ssshh…the pain has only began. I would break you till your tears become blood and your blood becomes tears. Till you hate me so much you become numb. Till you would no longer feel hate nor love.”

I didn’t understand. But I wanted him. So bad. And not just sexually. I wanted his body, his spirit, his mind. I wanted him to become Me for an Us to be born. So I stood there. Listening to his strange demands.

Then it began. Mind-blowing joy and pain interspersed together so wickedly I thought I was going to die. 

His lips did unfathomable things to my punani, teased my clit to release its hottest, wettest secrets, all the while his fingers slid in and out my wetness. I grabbed his locks hard, my nails digging deep into his scalp. God, it felt so good. His big hands slid to my buttocks and drew me closer to the relentless damage that was his mouth. I lifted my head up and cried out. He held me tighter, moving his teeth and tongue faster. 

I felt myself about to lose myself, slip over the edge. I whispered his name, felt my spirit about to give in, to let go into that heaven only lovers find.

Then it stopped. The pleasure. He stopped. 

He slapped my eyes shut with his big palms.

“Eyes still closed.”

I felt like crying. I was panting really hard. My chest filled with indescribable feelings. Like being stuck in an out-of-body experience, only your spirit was still halfway in the body while the other was half wrenched out, was hanging out limp and confused.

He swept me off my feet into his arms and lay me on the soft furry rug that covered the length and breadth of the room. He bent over me, rubbed his slightly open lips on mine, light feathery brushes, breathing his sweet breath into my parted lips like God did Adam. I felt new, sucking in his breath. Felt whole. This was what The Very First Kiss of Creation must have felt like. My lips yearned to taste deep, suck his in but he simply continued with the teasing brushes, nibbling my lower lip, brushing his tongue lightly on my upper lip.

Then he delved deep inside my mouth with his tongue and our tongues danced an old dance, a dance choreographed from the beginning of time. He put my arms around his neck and my legs automatically wrapped themselves around his naked lower half. He whispered in between breath pauses, “I love you.” My heart melted. I pulled him closer, warmth spreading across my thighs as I felt his hard membrane on my inner thigh.

He let go of me gently and for the briefest of seconds. I couldn’t help but moan long into the rug when I felt the feather he began to tickle my nipples with. Round and round he went, setting my senses on fire. The warm wetness of his mouth warmed the other nipple while the other was made painfully hard by the feather. I thought I would lose it till he slipped the feather down my belly to the very heart of me. 

“You love it?” 

I nodded, grabbing his arm hard. The tip of the feather teasing my very tip. If my clit could talk, it would scream all manner of obscenities. I couldn’t lie still. My body shook as though I was possessed. I had been possessed. By him.

Then he slid his long, hard member inside me. I groaned so long he kissed me deep to stifle it. My legs pulled him deep, my hands wrapping themselves about his smooth, hard back and holding him tight. Our bodies became one, making outlawed rhythms in unison. One. Oneness. Universal. He had my head in his hands, holding me close, so close. He whispered how beautiful I was, how much he loved me…

“You feel this?” he panted, “we are one.”

Then the fluttering beginnings of an out-of-body experience began again. I welcomed it with so much pleasure. This time, this one time, it was going to be real, powerful.  “I found it, I’ve finally found it…” kept ringing through my over-sensitized mind. I loved him. I loved every bit of him. He completed me. He was me. This fiery feeling of love in body and soul and spirit brought tears to my eyes.

“It’s alright baby,” he whispered when he tasted the salt of my tears. “Just hold me. Love me. I would complete you.”

My legs held tighter as he pumped slowly, his waist dancing rhythms into my innermost core. Then his rhythm quickened and my pulse quickened to match it.

“It’s time,” he said. 

I kissed him hard. Then it came. The Moment. That moment when body exploded to stars…angels reached out for my fingertips. I smiled, preparing to let myself go in the holy arms he had shepherded me to. I sighed.

Then it stopped. He stopped. Pulled out of me so fast it was almost painful. My eyes helplessly snapped open. My body did not, could not understand this wickedly abrupt change. It convulsed and curled up, torn between pleasure and pain. I shook uncontrollably in this pain-pleasure as though I was being exorcised, only in this case, the demon was entering me not leaving me. He watched me quietly, calmly, his face hauntingly expressionless. The pain became so unbearable I let out a huge sob, a cry that came from the very depths of me.

He watched me groveling at his feet. His face, so cold and removed, made me weep harder. The pain was unbearable. I did not understand. He dressed up silently, my eyes watching him painfully.
He moved with even steps toward the door. My heart was in my mouth, too frozen in shock and agony to call out to him, he who had become the very core of my being.

“I never want to see you again,” he whispered, and stepped out into the night.

Death for me was not a phenomenon that ended after that day. Hate’s passion ceased to be as invigorating so could no longer be a comfort. Love? She was murdered the day he killed me. I tore her heart out with my teeth. I’ve been a killer on the prowl since.

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